Of wolves and lion hearts
by TechNomaNcer28
Summary: One shots.Pairing:Regulus/Remus.Ratings can change for every chapter. Ch4:It has been years since Regulus has died but where the heart is concerned, even old magic can make almost-miracles possible.
1. A bright little star

A/N: Hey guys, Techy here!^_^!So I'm not being the most loyal RS fan at the moment, honestly how could I even think of Remus/Regulus being more lovable than them,right?!So here I am, traitorous me, in love with this pairing. I want to do a one-shot series, drabble-y sort of thing and yes, it's all Regulus/Remus. I'd love prompts though, a word, a song, even a picture, anything works really! On to the fic!Enjoyyy!

Disclaimer: All characters and places belong to J.K. Rowling.

Pairing: Regulus/Remus(Pre slash)

Rating:K

Summary:One evening in the library, Remus demonstrates the use of a muggle wooden stick.

Word count:1139

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A bright little star

"Oh my God, Remus. What _is_ that thing?" Regulus, now fourteen, slightly shaggy haired rubbed his right eye furiously with his awkward, growing-boy hands. Remus looked up from his parchment in amusement.

"Well, I certainly haven't been called _that_ before." He replied, his eyes twinkling, "It's more of monster and goody two shoes nancy boy." Regulus glared at him as he handed the pencil back to Remus who graciously accepted it. Normally he would have made some sort of remark about how Remus was no monster but right now he had other things to deal with.

"Why would you even use that muggle thing?" He asked, still annoyed, "When you've got a perfectly magical quill and me around?" He took up his wand and performed a handy erasing spell on a word in Remus's essay. Remus sighed.

"Regulus, it's familiar and easier for me, you know that." He reminded him and Regulus remembered that yes, it had something to do with Remus's mother teaching him his first writing with that thing. And they even came in colours, Remus had told him but he stubbornly set his jaw.

"Yeah, but you're a wizard and as such it should be a lot easier for you to just use a spell rather than that-" He motioned towards the pencil, "-thing." He finished with a deliberate sneer and Remus smiled.

"Admit it Reg, you're only annoyed because it's a muggle invention." His eyes had that twinkly thing again, Regulus would never understand how he did that. "If you weren't just playing around with it, you'd find it convenient too." Regulus was about to deny anything of the sort but then Remus was pushing his chair back and walking around the table and before Regulus had comprehended the situation, he found himself sitting and the werewolf standing beside, slouching slightly as he took up the bloody wooden (pensil?) thing.

"You just hold it like a quill, Regulus." He instructed softly as he reached his right hand around and gripped the young Black's one. Regulus found his fingers being pried open by Remus, his quill being dropped beside his homework and the (pensyl?) stick transferred into his hand. He wanted to yell at him for treating him like a child and then wondered if the library had been this warm all the while or if it was just having Remus leaning into him with his hand covering his.

"Like this?" He asked, glad that he hadn't lost all voice but still wished he hadn't almost whispered. He felt Remus nod, his chin lightly pressed against his hair. He closed his eyes as Remus moved their hands together on the parchment in front of him; it was for his homework and he had just written the date but he couldn't find it in himself to say so and just felt the closeness, the warmth of Remus's arms, his body…

His eyes opened when the motion and scratchy noise of lead against paper stopped. He looked down at what was written. Remus somehow seemed closer now, Regulus wanted to lean back and melt into him.

"What's that?" He asked finally after reading the words and this time his voice was all hush-hush whisper. Remus's fingers were now curled around his and he swallowed feeling the roughness of his against his softer ones; seekers really did have it easier than everyone else.

"It's the title of a book ." Remus replied, his voice soft and soothing as always and Regulus's heart sped up as he felt Remus lower his head just a bit so that his lips were now against his ear,"Sounds rather like you, I think." Regulus steeled himself and turned his own head slightly. He looked up into the usually warm brown eyes that seemed to hold something indefinable now, he was sure he had never seen something so intense before.

He was just about to raise his free hand when suddenly a loud laughter broke through the trance. He only felt Remus's fingers grip his in a very tight hold for a second before he let go and straightened up with his normal smile plastered across his face as he turned to see a very jovial Sirius strutting in their direction.

"Well, my dear Mr. Moony and Little Black." He announced loudly much to the other students' annoyance and grinned when he noticed it but lowered his voice any way, "I say that's enough studying for the both of you for a Friday night when what we should be doing is getting drunk and plucking flowers if you get my meaning." He said with a wink and Regulus made a face while Remus rolled his eyes.

"Aah, yes." He moved around to his seat, "The joys of being fifteen." He added with an amused look in Regulus's direction who returned it once he had gotten over the need to scream at Sirius for his very very wrong timing, he didn't know what exactly would have happened right then, but somehow it felt like he had just lost his chance for something wonderful.

"We'll be done in a few minutes, Sirius." Regulus replied in his aristocratic, good-boy tone making his brother snort at him a little like an uncivilised person but he sat down beside Remus anyway.

"I need to make sure you guys actually stop studying within the next five minutes." Sirius told them when they looked at him questioningly. Regulus hid a smile and turned to Remus to ask for an extra parchment but the words died in his throat when his eye caught that reddish strand and a white or two with it, his head lowered a little more holding that muggle pen-something thing looking very much golden in the candle-lit library.

"Hey, Remus. How do you spell 'pencil'?" The emanating laugh from Remus was quite worth it really even as Sirius decided to never let his baby brother live this one down. And because he was the reason for that carefree laughter, Regulus decided that he hadn't really lost all chances for the 'something wonderful', he would just take the next one or in fact just not wait for luck to favour him anymore. He was a Slytherin after all.

He looked down at his parchment with the crooked handwriting of both his and Remus's and even raised his wand to try and erase it but then stopped, folded it up and placed it carefully between the pages of his Defense Against the Dark Arts text book. Then slowly, very slowly he touched his foot lightly against Remus's under the table as Sirius continued rambling and they looked up at the same time and shared a private smile.

Regulus placed the book over his lap and simply placed a hand over the parchment with their written words.

_"My very own bright little star."_

-Fin-_  
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Uwaaaahh!Reviews are love, my lovelies!XD!All constructive criticisms, errors in punctuation marks and all are encouraged!And yes,in case you were wondering,the last words were the words that Remus wrote on the paper!And of course that was a made up name,i mean come on,who names a book like that?!Me apparently!lol!


	2. A little love and a little smoke

Disclaimer: All characters and places belong to J.K. Rowling.

Pairing: Regulus/Remus

Rating:T

Summary:Sometimes all you need is a little love and a little smoke by the evening to get over all that just isn't right.

Word count:4121

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A little love and a little smoke

He looks at the door open by itself, the door close by itself like something out of a horror story-a typical one-and then there's a familiar hand in the air and it's pulling back the cloak revealing _his_ familiarly tired face and slightly disheveled brown hair which he shakes a little.

Regulus waits for these nights.

And now Remus will turn and look around for Regulus as if he would somehow vanish, as if this was all only an elaborate prank set up to humiliate him, as if he is his brother. And then Remus does look at him but tonight there isn't that relieved look crossing his features and no smile following the look; only something resembling apprehension and Regulus's insides grow cold. He knew or at least he had gotten wind of exactly what his latest visit to Number Twelve Grimmauld had been about.

"What's wrong? Not happy to see me?" Regulus can't help feigning innocence and he smiles. Remus however doesn't return it nor does he reply, so Regulus does what they come to these dark, empty classrooms for and gets up sleekly from his perch on a desk and just as elegantly crosses the distance between them before placing his hands on Remus's shoulders.

For a second Remus's eyes flare as if to push him away but then Regulus sees the movement of his Adam's apple and he leans forward to press his lips against it. Then Remus's arms are moving and there's a hand on the small of his back and another against his face, tilting it so that Regulus can't hide the depth of his feelings fast enough but right now he doesn't even want to, because this may be the last time they do this, unless Remus with his kind heart and soul can't stand leaving him all heart-broken. But that seems too much like pity and Regulus instantly detests himself for even thinking along such lines. There isn't anything heart-breaking about this.

Remus's breathing is already harsh when he is looking into his eyes and Regulus licks his lip wanting to urge the older boy so they don't have to wait anymore; he has waited too long already. And it works, like always, because Remus's eyes dart downward to his mouth and his palm somehow seems to tighten as they move back just a bit into his hair and then they're kissing with lips pressed hard and Remus's arms tight all around him and their bodies hard and perfect against one another. It's burning and feverish and it's like home.

Regulus waits for these interludes, he waits patiently on the outside and fidgety on the inside for them.

Then it stops all at once and Remus's arms just lose their hold as if they have been cut off by a powerfully cast jinx and he steps back. And it all happens so fast that Regulus with all his usual eloquence is left standing with his arms dropping at his sides and lips still parted but he regains his haughtiness in a moment and looks up at Remus with a raised brow.

"Well." He starts again, "Are you planning on telling me what this is all about?" When Remus sighs angrily and runs a hand through his hair, Regulus doesn't think he wants to stand about all night dealing with it and maybe he could just leave now for his dormitory. It meant not having Remus tell him that this thing between them would be over, at least not tonight. And that sounded bloody great.

So he huffs in what he assumes is a dignified manner and brushes by Remus making sure that their left shoulders touch and Remus can feel the heat all the way up and down his arm. But Remus grabs him by the elbow before he can take more than a step away from him. Regulus entertains the notion of Remus having felt the connection between them and so never wanting to let go but it really is too bad that he is a realist. Had always been one.

"Regulus." And _Salazar_, if Remus's hoarse whispers never fails to send his temperature through the roof; if Regulus didn't welcome it so much he would have hexed him long ago for even trying to, no doubt do some bodily harm to his insides. But he doesn't want to answer because it seems to have an effect that way, as if he does not care enough about Remus's explanation…or that he actually does.

"Regulus." He repeats and this time he sounds controlled and Regulus turns to him to see a tentative smile as if he is just being polite because the alternative may not be something good. "How were your Easter holidays?" Well, trust Remus to ask that way and make him actually feel a tiny bit guilty for not having written to him or reply to his mails over the holidays. He let it go however and shrugged with a plastered smile.

"Oh, it was good." Then, "Really good, in fact." It's easy to shake his arm out of Remus's grasp and sits atop a desk again before recounting his holidays that had most definitely been something to look forward to. "For once, the evenings ended well. Oh and Bella and Cissy-you know, Narcissa-were there too. Oh! And grandfather Pollux too so the whole family-"

"The whole family?" Remus interrupts and his eyes are that feral looking kind, the kind that can bring Regulus to his knees in moments of heat and scare him just a little-very little-when he is like this. Because while Regulus knows he is a great duelist-they both are-he also knows that he will hurt Remus if it becomes necessary. Killing him for the Dark Lord's sake however…he's not so sure so he doesn't think about it.

But Remus is shaking him by the shoulders and Regulus is forced to listen to him as he says something about Sirius…

"…He's your brother, Regulus. And you-just-to just disregard him like that-" And because Remus is actually frustrated and pacing now, it's at times like these Regulus wonders if perhaps he would rather have gotten together with Sirius if possible and if he was just another second choice in the history of second choices that seemed to be his life. The life of a second child…

"He left us." Regulus tells him, somehow he has always evaded talking about Sirius and Remus has always let it go because he supposes-hopes-no one wants to think of their best friend when they are snogging wetly with limbs intertwined and sweaty with said best friend's brother. "He could have had everything, Remus. Everything. Our family, me, everything…" And Regulus hates the way he sounded just now, because he does still hope for a miracle to turn Sirius back, to come and ask for forgiveness. But he _is_ a born and bred Black so that idea was the most impossible of impossible.

"You?" Remus leans back against the table opposite to his and Regulus can't help noticing the distance, "You could have gone with him, Regulus. He told me, us." At this Regulus feels the pent-up anger starting to surge upwards from inside.

"Gone with him? Run away to that-that Potter's house?" And he can see that Remus doesn't like the way he almost spits out 'Potter' from the way he frowns so he wills himself to calm down because shouting and the like were more of Sirius's manner than his. "And become a charity case? I don't think so, Remus. Sirius was stupid, I'm not." Remus gives him a disbelieving look.

"Well, at least you would have been out of that prison you call home." Remus's voice has risen too and Regulus momentarily wonders if Filch can hear them from wherever he is roaming around now looking for students like them who are out for a little sexual escapade, at least they had been, Regulus is not so sure anymore and it only intensifies his anger and makes him ball his fists.

"Prison?" He bites out, "That's my house, our house. The Blacks'. Who do you think-"

"I'm not like you." Remus breaks into his outraged claims with his calm demeanour back, "But I do know where I have a home, Regulus." Remus had been looking down but now he looks up at him, "Are you happy there?" Regulus wants to ask where 'there' is but somehow knows that Remus won't be thrilled and it will make him look stupid, which he is not.

"Of course I am." Regulus answers any way and he is brilliant at lying so anyone else would have believed, Remus however just gives him a sad smile and pushes himself off the desk and in that scarily-mystifying way is in front of him in the blink of an eye. He is still giving him that look and Regulus doesn't want it because Remus doesn't understand; he himself was almost a Mudblood after all.

"I see." Remus replies simply and Regulus is a little surprised that he let it go so quickly so he watches cautiously as Remus raises his hand and places it over his thigh, leans closer and kisses the corner of his mouth. Regulus doesn't know what has changed Remus's mind but he is not complaining because they seem to have evaded the topic of holidays and hence the Dark Mark that is branded along his forearm like a medal, a proof of how he has done what Sirius was too hot-headed, too afraid to do; proof that he does not run away like his brother. So much for his prided Gryffindor courage.

Regulus responds eagerly and shifts his face just _so_ that their lips meet in a somewhat desperate kiss; he can feel Remus's anguish in the kiss and raises his arms to encircle them around Remus. But Remus grabs both of his arms and pushes them back so that they are forced to rest against the table top and it is a little vexing and confusing because Regulus likes the way Remus is being so uncharacteristically forceful and also rebellious against such treatment because he _is_ a Black after all.

He struggles a little and feels the hands around his wrist tighten and Remus deepens the kiss simultaneously so Regulus can't really think anymore but only feel as Remus's right hand slips under his left palm and their fingers intertwine, then his fingers are traveling up and unbuttoning the cuff of his shirt and Regulus's eyes snap open in realisation.

"No!" Regulus pulls away, trying to dislodge his wrist from Remus's hand but he sees the look Remus has and he knows that he has literally been tricked as Remus's strong grip ends up tearing the sleeve of his shirt right up to his elbow and the Dark Mark is inky and glowing eerily in the dim flame of the floating candles.

Remus stares at it and the silence that is reigning upon them right now is deafening, disturbing and Regulus wants to say something, he wants to apologise even though he has done nothing wrong but Remus is staring down at it, Regulus's wrist still in his grasp but it's not so tight anymore.

"It's true then." Remus states normally as he lets go of his hand and Regulus feels the air leave his insides as his hand falls uselessly beside him because something is over and it feels ominous.

"It's my responsibility now." He says, needs to explain to Remus why he has done what he has even though he does not owe him anything. Remus is just a distraction that every boy his age needs, the difference being that he is not a girl. "Sirius ran away from it, so I have to be the one." He sees Remus huff disbelievingly before he is straightening his robe and turning away towards the door. His stomach clenches at the sight and he is reaching out before understanding what he is doing when Remus whirls around and he drops his hand only to look up and see an unusual anger painted across his face.

"This is not responsibility. It's madness." Remus tells him harshly, "And I've had enough of you. I'd wish you best of luck with your life from now on, but really, fat chance of that anymore." He looks at the Dark Mark scathingly before turning away again. Regulus's blood boils.

"Enough of me?" He scoffs and lets out a scornful laugh, "Don't be daft, Lupin. Like _you_ didn't come on to me, of course." When Remus stops in front of the door, his fists clenched, Regulus leaves his place and stalks up to the older boy, anger and apprehension coiling inside him.

"Well, _you_ can try looking for someone else-someone who'll waste their time on you-but really, fat chance of that anymore." He mimics seeing the strong jaw clench and steps closer behind the other but Remus strides forward, grips the handle of the door and turns his head just a bit towards him.

"It's disgusting what you've allowed to be done to yourself." He says softly and Regulus sees his gaze travel to the Dark Mark. It makes him want to scream and it is so very hard to keep himself in control when all he wants to do is reach out, hold on to Remus and to tell him to _'just, please…don't leave.'_

"You don't understand." He whispers harshly, "You'll never understand it." It isn't disgusting, the Dark Mark is equal to an honourable badge and Remus can't see that, can't see how it has made Regulus welcome into the family, how it has made Mother proud.

"And a good thing too, isn't it?" Remus replies looking directly at him, his eyes are suspiciously bright, Regulus can't help noticing. Then Remus shakes his head and opens the door. The sudden cool air doesn't freeze Regulus as Remus's next words do, "Forget it, Reg. I don't want to understand it." And Remus looks at him again before saying his last real words to him, "Sometimes…I kept forgetting who you really were." And he leaves, just like that he is gone and Regulus is left staring at the open gate, feeling nothing except the slight howling of the air in the corridors but even that is not so noticeable.

He doesn't know what to do so he gathers himself, automatically grabs his wand and repairs his shirt, then proceeds to return to his dormitory because it feels like something in him has just died.

OoOoOo888888888OoOoOo

It is the day before their graduation-Sirius's and his friends' that is-and Regulus sees the bustling activities of the Professors, prefects and Peeves alike in the corridors, the classrooms, the Great Hall, in short: everywhere.

School is not the same without their trysts anymore.

Some days he almost runs into Remus-today being one of those-and he usually averts his eyes and goes on his way, ignoring the twinge in his chest which has considerably diminished since those first days of stopping whatever they had. Remus usually follows suit and acts as though he does not exist. Sirius tries too but his glare is slightly penetrating so it actually makes Regulus's grip around his books tighter.

So it comes as a surprise when Remus stops, looks at him and Regulus feels some kind of a pull, maybe because they will not be seeing each other again-most likely-and he is startled to see Remus look slightly unsure, opening his mouth as if to say something.

Today he is with Evans and Regulus is starting to feel his heart rate rising so he walks fast and past them, heading towards the Dungeons. He hears a set of familiar footsteps jogging up to him from behind and begins panicking slightly because he does not know how to say something without giving away just how much he-_fuck_-misses Remus, how much he still wants him.

"Reg. Regulus!" Remus sounds slightly annoyed even though his voice hasn't risen than usual but then Regulus feels his hand wrap around his arm and he is jerked back. His back touches Remus's chest lightly and the familiar spark ignites within him but Remus lets go of him when they both see a passing Slytherin First Year scrutinising them, as if a Gryffindor is attacking their prefect. Regulus raises an eyebrow at the girl who scuttles away; some things don't change.

"Hey." Remus says and he turns towards him but not really looking at him, "Do you have some time right now?" Somewhere inside him Regulus knows that if it was possible, he would have all the time in the world for Remus but he merely shrugs.

"I guess." He replies without looking at him still, "But for five minutes only." He states firmly, it _is_ almost evening after all. Remus nods and gestures towards the direction Regulus had just come in from.

They are walking beside each other with a considerable few inches separating them but Regulus feels some kind of a current run along his body, the very same kind that he had gotten so used to before; he hadn't realised how much he had missed it. And it is so very hard to not inch closer to Remus, to brush his hand against him in pretense of a misstep but he keeps his face straight and walks towards the grounds.

He wonders if Remus feels the same.

"So." Remus starts first once they reach outside; they are in a spot behind a particularly large rock so that not too many people can see them and Regulus's body relaxes a little. "How have you been?" Regulus still doesn't look at him, he isn't sure if he will be able to keep his composure and not do something stupid like throw his arms around Remus and hold on tight. Those eyes and every expression has been imprinted on the back of his eyelids and pathetic as it may be, he does visit each and every one of them when he is alone behind his bed curtains.

"Well." He shrugs a little, he's been doing that quite a bit these days, he realises. He considers lying but Remus will be gone and it really doesn't matter what he says now; they are done and over as they are supposed to be. "I've been better." He sees Remus's shoe shift beside his and gulps as he feels him slide closer; not yet touching, but closer. He feels Remus shuffling around for something and looks from the corner of his eyes to see him pull something out of his pocket after which Remus turns towards him and he looks away trying to appear disinterested.

"Is that-" Regulus has to blink once to make sure that he really is seeing his fellow Prefect do such a thing and it looks tempting especially because of the way his lips are wrapped around the thin stick.

"Cigarette? Yes." Remus completes for him with his usual twinkle in his eyes before pursing his lips. Regulus feels a bit hot around the neck so he looks away but suddenly the smoke hits the side of his face and his nose; it is so very hard not to cough at the strong scent. He turns towards Remus with a glare.

"Did you just blow that-that smoke at me?" Regulus asks disbelievingly and Remus's chuckle is so very endearing. Oh Salazar, what is _wrong_ with him today?

"You looked like you could do with some of it." Remus tells him and continues inhaling making the visible end glow and Regulus has the slight urge to give it a try but he puts on a stern expression.

"I don't think so; it's a disgusting habit really. Smoking." He adds for the effect and Remus still has that frustratingly amused expression. He exhales a cloud of smoke and looks away from Regulus.

"You get used to it, disgusting as it may be." Remus replies, "I guess some things just are like that." Regulus's heartbeat suddenly feels like thunder in his own chest. He couldn't possibly mean…

He is forced to look at Remus as he waves his hand in front of his face holding the lit cigarette and then offers it to him with a raise of his cinnamon-coloured eyebrow. There is a voice that sounds suspiciously like a cross between his and Sirius's from when they used to be five and six years old that is just telling him, pushing him to _just try it for once, what's the harm in it?_ Regulus reaches out and plucks the cigarette from Remus's fingers without any accidents or burns or any disaster whatsoever before inhaling it the way he had seen Remus do it.

Remus snorts unhelpfully as Regulus coughs on his first attempt but he manages his Black glare which unsurprisingly does not seem to intimidate Remus at all. But he has always been a good learner and he gets it fast so that after a couple of minutes there is less than half the cigarette left and he is inhaling and exhaling without any trouble. He really is a natural at everything he does.

"Hey." Remus says softly and plucks the cigarette out of Regulus's lips with a gentle pop and takes a long drag after which he exhales slowly and Regulus is a little mesmerised by the smoke rings and the next ones that are shaped dog-like and a stag and a mouse-or is it a rat?-run circles around each other until they waft into the colourless air. Remus inhales and turns to him with a challenging look and Regulus just cannot turn that down so he shifts closer than he needs to, pulls the cigarette out of the other's mouth and before he has the chance to lose his nerve, kisses him instantly.

Remus, Regulus realises must have been feeling the way he has been too because within a second or two he finds himself pulled into his lap. Regulus inhales the smoke from in between their lips and pulls back to exhale it upwards in a slow motion that ends up as rings, nothing fancy. When he looks down at Remus, a satisfied smirk tugs at the corner of his lips and Remus smiles at him before tangling his hand in the hair at the nape of his neck and pull him into an open-mouthed kiss that Regulus just can't help but return. Their tongues touch and Regulus feels Remus push him down on the ground.

His world rights itself again. It is a little scary how Remus can make him feel so intensely.

The need for air makes Regulus curse it inwardly as they break apart and he looks up at Remus's glowing gaze as he is looming over him in the darkening afternoon.

"Ten points from Gryffindor." Regulus announces breathlessly, "No smoking on school grounds; you of all the people should know that by now, Lupin." Remus eyes the last stub of cigarette held in Regulus's fingers; it is a miracle that nothing catastrophic had happened in the midst of their frenzied snogging.

"I suppose that's ten points from Slytherin too." He tugs the cigarette out of Regulus's hand and pulls the boy up so they can sit against the large boulder but with minimal distance this time. "Seeing how you have the nerve to smoke in front of a Prefect that too. Tut, tut."

Regulus settles himself comfortably, his back against Remus's chest and smiles lazily when Remus generously holds the cigarette to his lips. He takes a large drag and waits until Remus has taken the last one before throwing the cigarette end away. He goes first and exhales the smoke that take strange forms that could have been dragon wings or Hippogriffs or nothing at all and he is not that annoyed when Remus's smoke rings come out perfectly.

"I still don't like it." Remus tells him as he is running his fingers along his left arm where the Dark Mark rested, "But…" He doesn't need to finish it. Regulus nods sleepily as he watches the smoke drift upwards; it is rather pretty, he thinks and strangely it makes him want to tell Remus how much he means to him, how much he really cares.

But he does neither and instead places one hand over Remus's that were wrapped around his waist and lets the other snake along upward around his neck as he rests his head on the older boy's shoulder. Remus sighs a little but nuzzles his neck in a cat-like manner.

Regulus doesn't want to think of the future now; somewhere in him, he knows that Remus, for all his attitude to play the saviour for him and those closest to him will not be able to save him. It was just too late and he had a duty to fulfill. If it came down to it, Remus would choose to kill him, he knows because now he is the enemy and there are people at stake.

The smoke makes the surroundings look like a water-painting and the dream-like state is perfect. For once, Regulus is ready to just _be_.

_-Fin-_

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I certainly hope this one-shot doesn't seem too long or dragged out and just plain weird!I might have gotten some things wrong regarding the smoke scene but hey,they are wizards! ^_^!As always,reviews are love and if there are any mistakes,please let me know!They are greatly appreciated!


	3. Lie not about love

Disclaimer: All characters and places belong to J.K. Rowling.

Pairing: Regulus/Remus

Rating:M

Summary:It is easy sometimes, to believe that it is him Remus wants. he knows that it is Sirius he wants. Always Sirius.

Word count:2912

Specially dedicated to 'Being a Wallflower' since I read her fic and had the sudden urge to write such an angst filled one-shot!

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Lie not about love

Sometimes when Remus looks at him, his liquid eyes full of an overwhelming emotion, he almost wants to believe that it is him he wants. Desires. Almost.

When they are rocking too hard, too fast against each other-Remus inside him because of the unexplainable loneliness he is feeling at the time-and he feels Remus's heated words rather than hear them because there is the rush of blood pounding in his veins, of sensuous feelings overloading his very system, he can almost believe that Remus wants him. Almost.

Remus isn't allowed to look, not when they are close to coming any second now and certainly not when they are interlocked far too intimately because even though Remus may be willing to be taken on all fours, he always insists to face Regulus when he is not on the receiving end. Regulus still does not know why he has let someone like Remus invade his body in the first place…but perhaps he does know in some small part of him; it was better than the alternative of never having known this kind of connection, the kind that he can never have with a girl. He has tried that already.

Sometimes Remus is far too daring for his liking. When they have come down from their release, he doesn't pull out from inside him immediately; instead he has the nerve to graze his fingers against his pale, smooth cheeks brushing aside the sweaty fringe and murmur '_Regulus'_ in such a heart-felt manner that it makes Regulus hope for a few seconds.

For a few blissful seconds there he feels as though it really is him and not Sirius that Remus wants, has been in love with for a length of time Regulus does not ask about because it doesn't matter to him. Truly.

Every time-the rare times that it happens, though lately Remus seems to be trying to somehow emotionally attach himself to him-Remus gazes at him _that_ way and goes so far as to hold him after they have engaged in all sorts of unspeakable actions that Regulus makes sure to keep locked in some dark corner of his consciousness, he does not allow Remus to try and infiltrate his walls he has so carefully put up for days until his never-ending loneliness and hidden inferiority threatens to engulf him and all he can do is give himself to Remus and give and give some more after taking him for days previously.

Remus does not have to tell him; he knows. It is Sirius, it's always Sirius. Sirius is not somebody you just go and substitute. But Regulus? He isn't like his brother; never was in the first place. But he is the closest anyone can and will ever find to substitute that boy full of life, friends, adoration and love. Not just from girls that fawn over him; had that been the case, Regulus may have overlooked it. After all who needs girls and their doe-eyed worshipping?

He wishes he did not want more than just shagging with Remus, because that is exactly what they do-they have sex. Completely technical. No emotions attached. Least of all with somebody who could not even see him for himself because Regulus knows; knows who Remus thinks of when they slip away from the library, from dormitories and the rest of the world. It is always Sirius.

So he loses it because he hurts when he doesn't want to, because he feels for this plain, brown boy. Except that Remus is not so plain; there is his hair Regulus pulls at in fits of passion, his roughened features, his strong hands that run over his body and grasps him and holds him, his skin and mouth that when touch his own threatens to burn and melt him simultaneously and there is just so much mystery surrounding the boy that Regulus wants to know him. Know more than just his body and all those spots that make him squirm, sometimes laugh a little when he finds a ticklish spot and others that makes him groan in such ways that Regulus cannot help but take pride in for eliciting such reactions from him.

He wants to know more than just how intelligent Remus is at theoretical Potions and Defence and perhaps that is where his problems lie; he is forgetting how to sort out his thoughts and mixing up lust for something else entirely.

So he lashes out just this once and it is the only time he does because this needs to stop. Because this time Remus gasps against his neck and then pushes up from him to look at him even though Regulus has told him time and again not to though he distinctly remembers forgetting to have told him tonight. And he utters the horrible, heart-stopping words that make Regulus finally snap.

"_Reg-Regulus-I-I'm-" _And that is how far he goes because then he stops and looks down at Regulus with such foreign intensity that his heart skips a beat and he feels his stomach swoop down so fast that he does not have the time to hide his own vulnerable expression and Remus sees it. He sees and swallows hard and seizes the opportunity to grab Regulus's thighs so he can drive himself deeper before he can speak a word. Regulus's mouth drops open at the unexpected change in pace. Now Remus's eyes are closed, both of theirs are but suddenly they are both breathing harsher than before and gasping and Regulus cannot keep his voice down or keep himself from drowning in the wild passion of Remus's movements and the desperate noises he too seems to be unable to keep in check.

It is all so much and so overwhelming that for once Regulus finds himself clutching at Remus-his arm, his neck, his back-he doesn't know anymore. All he knows is that he feels like he is flying and falling at the same time and he has never been so hot, so feverish before, not like this. Then Remus tells him-no-_orders_ him to come with him; the nerve of him and Regulus does as soon as he feels Remus plunge into him one last time. His release leaves him boneless and weak so that he is shivering in Remus's embrace-when had that happened? Belatedly he thinks he may have called out something that sounded like Remus's name.

Inexplicably, he also feels the slight wetness on his lashes as his eyes remain closed and he is brought back to reality so fast that his walls come up instantly and he pushes Remus away. Hard. Remus looks straight at him, his expression not hiding anything for a change; he is looking for answers.

"I told you." Regulus starts angrily, "You weren't supposed to look at me, Lupin-"

"Not today, you didn't." Remus cuts in with his frustratingly patient expression, the one that makes Regulus feel a little like a child, "So we're back on second-name basis, are we?" Regulus manages a sneer while pulling on his shirt that he has thankfully found peeking from under the bed and looks for his pants but grimaces when he spots them somewhere closer to Remus's side. He tugs the shirt down to hide as much skin as possible; finally feeling back in control of the situation even though he can still feel Remus's release inside him which is really quite awkward.

"We aren't friends, Lupin." Regulus replies to that and Remus throws his hands up in frustration.

"Well, it certainly wasn't me who practically screamed out my name a few minutes back, yeah?" He shakes his head as Regulus's jaw clench involuntarily, grabs his trousers from the foot of the bed and pulls them on harshly. "Sometimes, I just don't understand you." He says so darkly that Regulus ends up spilling everything he has kept locked up inside.

"No, you don't. Why would you?" He swings his legs out of the bed as he too starts dressing with jabs of his limbs, "You never wanted to in the first place; so why would you want to now?" Remus looks at him from where he is retrieving his robe.

"What does that mean, Regulus?" He asks gently as he always does and walks closer to Regulus, "Regulus." He reaches out to place his hand on Regulus's arm but the latter jerks away. Remus lets out a heavy sigh before turning away and taking a seat on the bed.

"What happened just now?" He asks slowly as if testing to see how far he can push Regulus to get his answers, "When we were-" He waves his hand which Regulus understands to mean their enjoyable activity' of course, "I thought things were going rather well between us, wouldn't you say?" Remus says in that infuriatingly calm manner as if Regulus is the one that cannot see what is really going on here.

"Rather well?" Regulus asks in a deliberately disbelieving tone, "Don't flatter yourself, Lupin. What we do here has nothing to do with us getting to know each other. If you were looking to be friends with someone like me-" He spares him a perfected pitying look before tying his tie, "-Get real, Lupin. You are practically a Mudb-"

"Shut. Up." Regulus's eyes widen slightly at the speed with which the other prefect has managed to come standing before and have him at wand-point. "God! You don't change, do you? When was the last time you had a friend? A real one." He adds just as Regulus is about to reply and he finds that he has to lie because he cannot be honest with himself about this, "I thought so." Remus says shaking his head, "The same old blood purity shite your family-"

"My family-" Regulus cuts in enraged, "-don't bring my family into this, you-" Remus interrupts with a foreign laugh that Regulus hasn't heard before.

"Oh! Yes, of course. You and the rest of your _honourable_ Blacks and whatnot." Remus pockets his wand and roughly runs a hand through his hair, "I'm glad Sirius got out of there while he could." The comment pretty much confirms all of Regulus's assumptions and he glares outwardly, his fists clenching as the unfairness of the situation strikes him deeper than before. He is angry, he is so very angry.

"Well, too bad for you I'm not Sirius." Before he himself realizes, Regulus is shouting loudly. Uncontrollably, "I am not Sirius. I never was and I'll never be like him." He throws his hands outwards to emphasize his point and in some part of him he knows that he has not openly shown himself like this in years and he shouldn't be but the sting of inferiority quails it and he finds his tongue speaking before he can really process his thoughts.

"You don't understand. None of you do and-" He runs his tongue over his lips and swallows, "-I hate it. You don't see me, Remus. I'm not Sirius…I'm not." Somehow he finds his voice lowering as his anger leaves him and all he has is the anguish that Remus always saw Sirius in him and now that he himself has broken that illusion, Remus will leave. He will.

"Regulus." Remus's own voice sounds like he is hurting which is only possible because that boy really tries too hard to save everyone and cares too much about people who will only end up hurting him. He is really quite gullible, now that Regulus thinks about it and he is sure Remus is going to try and be comforting because he is his best friend's brother and nothing more.

"Regulus, look at me." Regulus doesn't but he hears Remus sigh and feels his warm, rough hand against his, "I do. I do see you. I care about-" Regulus tears his hand away from his as he whirls around to face him, his eyes cold and glistening with tears of anger and a lot of hurt but he does not want Remus to see it so his lips curl.

"Don't mock me like that, Lupin. I know." He lowers his voice as if sharing a secret because this _is_ a secret that Remus does not want Sirius to know, "I know you think of Sirius. All the time."

"What? Reg-" But Regulus does not want to heart what he has to say because he is just going to deny it and even if he does not, he wants this to be over because he cannot continue playing Sirius's role for others any longer. He thinks he is reaching the limits of his patience and his duties as the heir has not even really begun. It is pathetic because he thinks that Sirius may have been able to do it all better than him, if only he had been a Slytherin. It would be easy for him because he does not think so much like Regulus himself; he just does what he sets out to do.

"Don't deny it. I know. It was always Sirius for you." Regulus tells him and sweeps a look across the room to see if he has missed any article of clothing and then back up at Remus, "Don't worry, he won't know unless you tell him." For some reason he feels the need to reassure Remus as the older boy is looking at him with surprise all over his face.

"Is that what you think?" Remus asks once he regains speech and he takes hold of Regulus by the arm, "No. Regulus, it's not. It was never Sirius. You need to underst-"

"Oh, I understand." Regulus interrupts as he tries to shake his arm out of Remus's grip, "I know it, Lupin. I know. I'm not stupid-"

"Looks to me like you are." Remus tells him heatedly before his expression takes on that lost look again, "Regulus, it's not-"

"NO!" Regulus manages to pull himself away from Remus and he hurries towards the entrance to the Room of Requirement, "Don't lie to me. Just. Don't." He knows he sounds like he is pleading and maybe he is, he wants to leave things as they are, not on good terms or anything of that sort. This is alright, this way he does not need to look back and remember all the good things that has happened with Remus in the secret corners of the school.

"Wow." Remus mutters, "Just…you're so intent on believing that you're right, you don't even see it." The somehow pained voice makes Regulus look at him with his hand on the wall where the doorway appeared. Remus is looking at him with an expression as if he has had his heart broken, "You don't get it. It's not Sirius. It hasn't been him for a long time now." That is all Regulus has to hear to know that Remus has thought of Sirius and he casts him a cold look.

"I don't care, Lupin. I don't." Regulus leaves because he knows what is real and what is true; he's always known it from the start.

OoOoOo888888888OoOoOo

Sometimes Regulus wonders if perhaps Remus may have cared about him, truly cared about him and not his brother, if he had been honest with him. It is easier these days to humour the thoughts and fantasize about the way his life could have been had he chosen to believe him. But it does cut through his insides when he realises what he has possibly given up for this short life of two years if Remus had been telling the truth.

He thinks he is crying now, it is difficult to tell while he is being pulled under water and he himself is fighting an inner battle whether to drown with the Inferi or save himself. He had thought he was ready, seems like he isn't after all. The world around is dark, crushing his entire being and his soul and breathing accidentally burns his lungs as another dark hand pulls him down into the fearful abyss. He really is still crying. He doesn't stop; there is nobody to see him, nobody for who he has to be the staunch-hearted substitute.

He thinks that no one ever really is ready for death, especially the kind where no one will miss him and no one will probably know of. This kind of bravery is not meant for him, he cannot dive to his death with a smile just because he will be helping in saving the world, he is crying. Had it been Sirius, he probably would have laughed in the face of death. This is why his brother had been a Gryffindor. He wasn't.

Sometimes he had cooked up scenarios where he would come across Remus as an enemy all of which ended with them reliving their school days of closeted passions and rough whispers. It had never happened. Regulus would have liked to see Remus one last time. He does not have the chance to have his life play out before him but there is a scene with a young Sirius and himself laughing. He does wish one last time though that Remus will cry for him, that he is crying for him right now as he feels Regulus's life slipping away. He hopes Remus has a longer life than he did, he is a good man; a really good man that is one of Regulus's greatest regrets for ever giving up. He thinks he hears Remus telling him that he is indeed a very brave man; one of the greatest he ever knew.

_-Fin-_

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Aahhhh!Well,a little angst-y!Okay,very angst-y!I kind of had a hard time writing this towards the end!But I have a much happier one-shot in my head which shall soon be up here when I get to typing it!Thank you for the follows and reviews!Until next time then!_  
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	4. Unshattered realities

Disclaimer: All characters and places belong to J.K. Rowling.

Pairing: Regulus/Remus

Rating:T

Summary:It has been years since Regulus has died but where the heart is concerned, even old magic can make almost-miracles possible.

Word count:1739

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Unshattered Realities

Remus shudders slightly as the cold hand touches his forehead. He knows what this is or rather, who this is.

"Remus." His voice…it never changed, maybe because he has never gotten the chance to grow up or maybe because he had grown too fast for his age and dived head-first into death. Only eighteen.

"I'm cold." Remus tells him hoarsely even though his body is burning up with the fever that has become a recurring pattern now, eighteen years now. Regulus nods and pulls the covers up, tucking them around Remus wordlessly.

"Remus." He repeats while stroking his damp hair and Remus leans into the touch, his eyes closed. Here in his rickety bed in the run-down house with its old furniture and the pitter-pattering of rain outside, nothing… no one can take this away from him-this one truly magical moment he has every year. The night of Regulus's death anniversary. Funny how it comes around much like a birthday.

"Not there." Remus manages to whisper and raises a hand to find Regulus's. He misses and ends up sweeping off his wand to the floor.

He hears a sigh and a shuffle which means that Regulus is moving away and he wants to tell him not to do so because…and then his wand is on the table with a clutter and Regulus's pale hand in his. A hand that should not have life, that should not be so soothing and comforting and yet is there. Remus tugs at his hand and pushes off the cover with hands that feel like lead but he needs to feel his warmth. Now. So Regulus takes the hint and settles under the covers.

"Better?" He asks and Remus nods as he leans into Regulus's body, wanting to merge with him now and forever so that he doesn't have to go back to the world, does not have to face another day without him. Regulus seems to sense it like always so he wraps an arm around him. Remus breathes in his scent which is just the same as always, as it used to be before his death. He pushes his knee between Regulus's legs wanting the contact and tangles his hand in his midnight-coloured hair. Regulus relents after a few moments of hesitation and drapes his leg over the lean, muscular thigh. They relish in the way their bodies are joined even without sparking any heat.

Remus has long since stopped trying to understand what it is that happens with Regulus and how he manages to come to him in such a solid form. Part of him knows that it is probably the fever that takes over him no matter how hard he tries to prevent it, but he so desperately wants to believe that Regulus is not an illusion; because illusions did not touch and caress and whisper words of love and cry tears of hurt. They just did not.

"Remus, you need to stop this." Regulus says just as Remus presses a daring kiss to his lovely throat and Remus thinks he misheard it but then he looks at the serious expression and shies away.

"Why? You know we don't have much time. Not until the next time." Remus reminds him. There is something peculiar in Regulus's expression after which he looks away.

"Remus." He says softly but does not continue; he has an expression that tells Remus that Regulus did want to say something to him but did not know how to. It was just a little unfair how much more open Regulus had become after death. If only he had been this way in life perhaps Remus could have found a way to know of Regulus's personal mission to bring down the Dark Lord and maybe even saved him.

He feels Regulus's fingers stroking his hair, an expression of longing on his face. It makes him want to shrink Regulus and tuck him away somewhere inside so he never has to feel this way ever again. But that is hardly possible so he raises his own hand and places it atop Regulus's one that is now holding the side of his face.

"Tell me." He finds Regulus look into his eyes and somehow he knows that there is bad news coming up. He doesn't want to know but at the same time, he needs to. So he squeezes his hand lightly in unspoken plea. Regulus nods.

"Tonight." He replies just as thunder rolls in again and lights up the ghostly features harshly for a minimal moment and Remus is struck again by how beautiful Regulus still is, unlike his worn own self. It must have shown in his unconscious ministrations of thumbing Regulus's cheek because the younger man-_ghost?-_looks at him fiercely.

"Remus, don't you even dare look down on yourself for any reason." He sounds so passionate that Remus deliberately deludes himself into thinking that he is alive and well. "The Wizarding World has given you far too many reasons but never believe that they are right." Remus nods because he doesn't believe in this world's prejudices and reasoning. All that breaks his soul and heart apart are the deaths of everybody close to him-his first friend, his best friends and his one true love.

"What about tonight?" Remus asks getting back on the topic because they do not have much time until dawn breaks upon the city and his world. Regulus goes back to looking glum and so disheartened that Remus decides to leave the subject alone but then Regulus is clutching his hand and speaking or trying to speak between broken pauses.

"I can't-Remus, the magic, it's-it won't hold for any longer." Remus understands what Regulus is trying to tell him without even elaborating it and he feels the air leave him as he grasps what he is being told, "Remus. Remus, I can't come back-"

"Stop!" Remus almost shouts out as another bout of thunder rolls in, "Stop it…you don't-that's not…" He trails off as the rain starts pouring in torrents now, the silence heavy with injustice at the end of their story. Curiosity, apparently killed wolves much as it did cats.

Then all of a sudden they are both clutching each other, holding on to each other as if it can stop the fast approaches of their unnerving fate and everything that lay beyond this night. Remus doesn't know who started first but he feels the wetness of tears on his face as they kiss and broken whispers of words that he cannot distinguish. He feels his heart breaking, his body burning with fever, melting from an overload of love and passion; he feels all of Regulus's feelings too as they connect deep down in their souls.

Their hands map each other's faces, the angular features and sharp joints that are digging in the softer parts of their bodies but the pain is only a welcome reminder of their shared reality; a reality that exists just for the two of them in the form of an old unknown magic at work. Their words and messages are a jumble of disconnected names and nouns and such-_ Remus. Regulus. Remus. Love. Please. Why? Remus. Need. Oh. Merlin. You. Regulus. Love. You-_because all they need is the closeness now and the time to stop. Forever.

But forever is not now, Remus feels the wolf in him wail primitively as Regulus pulls away from him, real tears flowing from his eyes down the bridge of his straight nose that Remus brushes his own one against while slipping in a frantic, chaste press of lips. Their tears mingle and Remus finds himself chanting "_Don't leave. Don't leave. Don't leave." _

"Remus. Please." Regulus stands up fluidly as a ghost should when the sounds of rain start waning, "You'll find me. I'll find you. You know I will, so please, just _live_." Remus realises that he has stopped crying despite the red eyes and wet face.

"I am living. I wish I wasn't though." He tells him, his whisper hoarse but Regulus is shaking his head.

"This isn't living, Remus. You're alive but you haven't been living for a long time now." Regulus kneels on the floor and carefully places a hand on Remus's burning forehead, "I want you to stop mourning everyone this way. I couldn't live for long, Remus. You have to, for me you have to." It is a selfish request and Remus finds himself about to refuse but he finds himself unable to when he sees the vulnerable expression of love and concern in Regulus's eyes, Regulus who is now slowly starting to fade at the edges.

"No." He whispers as he raises his hand. Regulus grabs hold of it still waiting for an answer. Remus gulps, "For you. If it's for you, I will." It's the only answer Regulus needs as he leans down and softly places a kiss on his forehead.

Remus does not know how this happened or what Regulus is truly. He often used to wonder if maybe he had lost his marbles but it doesn't matter because Regulus may not be alive or he may be in his head but he is real, he has been real for the one night these last eighteen years and his touches are real….

Regulus watches Remus's eyelids drop down, his breathing a little wheezy. So he continues stroking the light hair with peppered grey in them, taking in the features with a forlorn expressionuntil his breathing evens out somewhat. He traces a finger along the scar across Remus's otherwise straight nose in an attempt to maintain the contact for however long possible.

Outside, the rosy light of dawn peers through the curtains and manages to pass through Regulus's deathly form and highlight the sleeping body of a man who looks older than he has a right to do so. Regulus raises the covers up to Remus's neck and refrains from touching the man who is and has been a part of his soul and mind, lest he fails to return to the afterlife and lose his chance of a _Forever_ with him.

So Regulus turns away from him and faces the lovely light of dawn that seems to break his very being as he returns to his rightful place far away from the plane of the living as the sound of rain fades slowly into green leaves and muddy puddles on the streets of London.

_-Fin-_

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A/N:Reviews are wonderful as always!This came as a sort of inspiration from wanting to start a multi-chapter Regulus/Remus fic which I have yet to start properly!So if there are any confusion about this,I kind of took the idea from the resurrection stone when Harry's parents and all come back temporarily,there's obviously some kind of magic involving love in there is what I think!I'd love to see if you guys have any different viewpoints about it!I know I said it would be a happy one-shot but I decided to post this because I'd finished it yesterday and the happy one is still in the process of being written,and the other happy one-ahem-is troubling me because I can't seem to write the shmexy parts just the way I want!XD! :D!


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